When the relationship between parents changes, one or both may decide that this requires a change in care, responsibilities, and living arrangements for the children. Legally, these rights and responsibilities are accumulated under the concept of “custody.” Whether opting to get a court order formalizing the new situation or not, it is important to understand how the actions and feelings of both parents and children can both influence and be impacted by these changes.
How does Maryland law refer to the rights and responsibilities towards children?
Maryland family law has several approaches to the care of children, and it can be confusing to understand the distinctions. Here are the terms that generally describe how courts will describe and rule over a child’s upbringing.
Legal Custody. “Legal” custody refers to the rights and responsibilities of a parent (or guardian) over key decisions in a child’s life, including issues like education, medical, religion, and overall well-being. Maryland courts are strongly resistant to taking legal custody away from a parent, so obtaining sole legal custody – which would allow a parent to make decisions about these issues without consulting the other parent – requires a high level of proof that it is in the best interests of the child to cut the other parent out of the process.
Physical Custody. Physical custody refers to where a child will live. As with legal custody, it can be joint or sole custody. Courts and parents can get highly creative in allocating physical custody depending on the best interests of the child and the circumstances of the parent or guardian. In fact, Maryland Courts have developed a default form that sets out many of the options available to decide how to share physical and legal custody. Depending on the age of the child, their preference for living with one or the other parent is given serious consideration by the court.
Child Support. Maryland courts analyze parents’ ongoing financial responsibility to their children by looking at various factors. The physical custody of the child is a major factor, since the expense of raising a child falls on the parents who take care of the child. The income of the parents – independently and in relation to one another – also received consideration. Maryland law has specific formulas that the courts are bound to use when ordering child support, but if parents reach an independent agreement about support, the court has the authority to approve a fair, if more flexible alternative.
Child Visitation. Where a parent is unable to obtain physical custody, or when other adults have an ongoing relationship with the child that they wish to preserve, Maryland courts have the authority to order some form of visitation. This can be constrained to supervised visitation in a neutral location or simply preserve an adult’s right to spend time with the child notwithstanding the wishes of the custodial parent. The best interests of the child will be considered. Maryland courts are highly reluctant to prevent a child from some form of contact with a parent.
The Impact of Custody Disputes and Decisions
When parents dispute custody issues, it can become highly emotional. Often, their personal feelings about one another can color their perspective and interfere with clear thinking about what would be best for the child. Where the relationship is highly acrimonious or even abusive, it can be incredibly difficult to assess the needs of the children in isolation. However, this is what Maryland law expects of parents, and courts will look to the best interests of the child over the convenience or wishes of the parents when deciding custodial matters. This can make a parent feel helpless or resentful that they do not have the independent ability to decide how to structure their own life or finances because of the imposition of a court order.
For the children, the change in the family dynamics can be traumatic. Often children feel like they are to blame, and they worry about whether their parents still love them, whether they will have a secure home, and what other changes might be in store for them. Parents who don’t understand and address their children’s fears can exacerbate the trauma, making them feel worse. When parents think about custody in terms of their own convenience or preferences, or if they take positions in a custody dispute out of spite for the other parent, they can make the children feel like pawns in the adults’ dispute. They may feel like they have to choose between the parents, and sometimes this feeling is a direct result of a parent actually expecting the children to take sides. All of these developments can have a highly negative impact on the emotional well-being of the children, which can manifest in other parts of their lives like academics.
Getting help to negotiate custodial issues
Whether parents are pursuing legal action or trying to resolve custody matters privately, it is worth utilizing the many resources available to help them with the process. For parents, this may be a rare or the only time they have personally experienced this sort of dispute, but Maryland courts, experienced family law attorneys, and ample other experts regularly assist parents with these difficult transitions. Rather than reinvent the wheel, it is worth using the expertise of others to help navigate these challenging transitions in a way that meets the unique needs of a particular family.
Malech Law is here to support you with child custody legal matters – call (202) 441-2107.